Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Top 4 Childhood Anxieties
I was a nervous little kid. But the things that caused me the most anxiety were pretty specific--nothing abstract like monsters or ghosts--and almost always really, really stupid (of course). Most of the things that made me nervous back then still make me nervous today.
4. Freddy Krueger attacks while I’m on toilet
This happens in one of the Nightmare on Elm Street movies, though I can’t remember which. I’m sure that Freddy Krueger’s teenage victims were killed in all sorts of terrifying and creative ways but this is the only one that I am able to recall because this is the only one that had any kind of impact on me. I suppose it seemed the most feasible.
3. The People Under the Stairs
I didn’t think that there were any people living under my stairs, nor did I think that any of the events that transpired in the movie were ever going to happen to me. But The People Under the Stairs managed to scare me so thoroughly that the mere mention of the movie made me tense.
2. Talking pigs
I’m not a fan of anthropomorphized animals in general--it’s really unnecessary--but talking pigs in particular make me uncomfortable. When I was growing up there seemed to be an abundance of these unnatural creatures. Babe, Porky the Pig, Wilbur from Charlotte’s Web, Gordy. Reading Animal Farm when I was older only made matters worse.
1. Willy Wonka as portrayed by Gene Wilder
There are a lot of inappropriate undertones in Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory but as a kid Willy Wonka made me nervous because of this (obviously):
and because of his hair. There was just something really creepy about his hair. Oddly enough, I wasn’t at all weirded out by the Oompa-Loompas. They actually seemed pretty dope.