I'd like to have 50 words with you...Person who thought it was okay to call Tiny Tim, Tiny Tim

This kid already has rickets or some kind of renal disease, he’s covered in 19th Century, Victorian era soot, and you wanna give him a height complex? Geez, you’re a prick. You need to be calling him something robust, something that’ll lift his spirits, like, Ten Ton Tim or Bruce.

I'd like to have 50 words with you...Everyone at Bogey Lowenstein's party

Bogey is a dick of the highest order but that doesn’t excuse your disregard for his home. Spitting tobacco into crystal bowls, table dancing, congregating around Mr. Cuervo! Where were you people raised? If your behavior is any indicator, there must’ve been a considerable amount of hay and livestock present. 

I'd like to have 50 words with you...Tum Tum (of the 3 ninjas)

Tum Tum, I find you grossly cavalier. You’re a slave to your tremendous appetite, I get that, but when you stop mid-battle to eat a cookie or a piece of redrope licorice, you place your life and the lives of your two brothers (Rocky and Colt) in danger. Cut it out.