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Apparently you're supposed to trade in your crayons for colored pencils when you turn 12. It's like some unofficial coming of age moment. But I like crayons. I like the way they feel in my hand. I like the black crayon and the red crayon and how they're always stubby and impossible to use. I like the way crayons smell. I like to call crayons "crayolas" even when they aren't crayola brand because the word "crayola" sounds exotic and sophisticated and makes me feel like an aristocrat.
Why are colored pencils more socially acceptable than crayons? What's so adult about them? If anything, they promote racial insensitivity and political-incorrectness. I mean, shouldn't it be "Pencils of Color"? Or, "Polychromatic-Pencil-American"? Well, I'm a crayon proponent and also a history enthusiast. I've combined the two passions and now you get this:
